Tuesday, October 27, 2015 @ 7:34 AM | 0 notes
This is so confusing...
It is not like what like the test of
"how to know if a guy like a girl" said.
Okay, I know he don't like me.
A good news, isn't ?
I been hoping for that to happen as I wouldn't want
to enter a futile relationship.
This is killing me.
I had been reading his messages over and over again.
Am I loving him?
Did I love him?
I am so confused.
The love and don't want to love is making my brain juice to dry off.
WEIRD.
I want to find him for console whenever I am down
ever since Sunday.
He is so good in consoling people. I didn't know that.
I did not meant to tell my troubles. But somehow, I spit
it out as the how comfortable the conversation flows.
He is really a great man.
Thus, I don't wanna ruin him.
So, no matter how I love him, I must forget him.
At my age, there's no guy would plan their future.
Yet, he is worrying about his future and planning from now.
But one thing I don't understand...
Why did he tell me he is worried no university want him?
And, why did he tell me about his plans for future?
XIAO DI DI, JIE JIE WO MEI XING QU LA.
However, it is great to see how you are fighting for your future already.
This makes me wanna give more effort in crafting the road that I am going to walk on.
He is so kind to shares those lame riddles I called with me.
It is really good in helping one to laugh off those hard times they experienced.
I am thankful for that.
He is so cute to ask NOT I HUMOROUS MEH?
when I said his friends are humorous.
I don't really understand why he had to add kidding after that sentence?
And also, when I said he looks like my dad.
He replied did I just get father zoned.
and a kidding right after that.
I can takes light jokes so its alright. I don't mind.
Even I always had my imagination to run wild, it is you so I have to control.
Thus, it is fine to say that.
I will not get other thoughts since if you like me.
Don't need to wait until now right? You can just show me in school.
After 3 years in poly, I had long forgotten what love is already.
Oh ya, thanks for encouraging me to trust others when I said I don't like to interact with people.
Such nice guy you are. DONT NEED TO SHOW
cause no matter what, you are still a nice guy to me. haha
THAT JUST DO IT is so irrelevant to that situation ehehehe.
Still grateful for that.
Your love for your internship surprised me...
I bet there is someone you like in the office hahahaah...
that's why you don't wanna leave.
WORK CULTURE?
Don't lie to me.... No one would like internship just because of work culture.
ATAS?
That sound kind of persuasive but still not enough to convince me.
AS I HATE INTERNSHIP THE MOST.
I just realised me and him. WE ARE REALLY TWO WORLDS APART.
Our likes and dislikes differ.
Worst of all, our thinking is like heaven and earth.
He is YOLO person yet I am a person who thinks a lot.
There is no way I would be a YOLO person like him.
Though he asked me not to think so much, but it is one of my personality.
I could not change with one sentence of yours.
However, our likes for japan is the same.
Lets go there together with our friends one day!
I didn't know he like JAPAN too...
HAHAHAHAHA, one like the same le.
When I said Japanese guy are cute , he said only the girls are cute.. HAHAHAHAHAHA
I am like of course la, you are a male right?
If you think like me, you go be ah gua la.
Hopefully, one day can go overseas with him since he is so funny!
I just need some one like him in my life to liven up my life.
BUT WAIT, I jian fei cheng gong first.
He is quite mature too as seen from the conversation.
I thought he will be like after grad go where play first but no.
How to go into an university is his top priority.... I LIKE HIM EVEN MORE LE.
He said he is not interested in relationship.
Ya, just focus on your studies first... is what I said...
You so handsome, sure bo? no girlfriend? ... is what I think.. haha
He has no girlfriend up till now? or have but just broke recently?
He don't seems like a player like the Sagittarius guy leh..
OMG, he is more and more towards my ideal type.
I read so much articles about cancer and Sagittarius are not compatible.
Hence, I thought we both will not be happy if we really get together.
Thus, I am running away from you without getting to know you personally first.
But, if you like other girls, I wont be sad as not loving you is my objective.
I will just wish you happiness with your love one. AS A FRIEND.
Cause I felt our relationship cant go further more than friend.
HEHEHEHEHE.
Lets have a coffee one day and talk about our experience....
I guess one day is not enough for us to finish our stories.. hahaha!
THANK YOU CHEE MING FOR KNOWING YOU!
GOOD LUCK IN BOTH OUR STUDIES AND FUTURE!
ACCOUNTANT FOR YOU AND INTERIOR DESIGN FOR ME!
I GO SLEEP LE, OYASUMI~~~!!!
Saturday, October 24, 2015 @ 6:37 AM | 0 notes
MY HEART IS SHAKING NOW...
NO NO NO NO NO .... !!
I DONT WANT TO LIKE HIM AGAIN!
PLEASE TELL ME NO I AM NOT!
IT TOOK ME FREAKING THREE YEARS TO FORGET HIM!
AND HIS ONE SENTENCE MAKES ME FALL IN LOVE WITH HIM AGAIN?
I DONT WANT. I AM NOT HAPPY WITH THIS.
Its hard to cry myself to sleep every night.
Its hard to think of you every single day when you don't give me a damn!
its hard to love someone that doesn't love you.
I REALLY HAD ENOUGH OF THIS HARDSHIP
I DONT WANT TO BE IN LOVE WITH HIM AGAIN.
One sided love sucks!
Please tell me he just treat me as friend!
I cannot endure the second attack of having to suffer!
Why is his conversation exact as what the internet said?
WO BU XIANG HU SI LUAN XIANG DAN WO MEI BAN FA.
I haven't really put you down so I cant really forget you.
I AM SO STUPID TO MESSAGE HIM.
If not, this would not happen.
It is rare that he will tell me what he is feeling and playing jokes with me.
But I am afraid of liking him again.
GIVNG YOUR EVERYTHING TO SOMETHING THAT WILL NOT HAPPEN.
I DONT WANNA DO IT!
I am already trying my best in everything I did but not this.
I am tired, super tired. EMOTIONALLY, PHYSICALLY AND FINANCIALLY.
I want someone to take care of me. NOT SOMEONE I LOVE YET DONT LOVE ME.
I WANTED TO HELP HIM BUT I DONT KNOW HOW TO HELP HIM!
HE LOOK SO KELIAN. I JUST WANTED TO GIVE HIM A PAT ON HIS HEAD AND
A HELPING HAND TO PULL HIM UP.
But I cant do that when I myself could not even stand up.
I am sorry!
WHAT AM I THINKING? OMFG! I JUST FELT THINGS LIKE THIS?
HCM.
IF YOU DONT LIKE ME, JUST GIVE ME AN EXACT ANS ON THAT I AM YOUR FRIEND.
I don't wanna play guessing games anymore.
Why AM I ALWAYS MISS THE IMPORTANT TIME TO BE WITH THE ONE I LIKE?
HE SAID THINGS MAKE ME FEELS HE LIKE ME
AND I AM VERY SENSITIVE THUS I FEEL LIKE THAT.
WHY AM I A CANCER?
I don't wanna be a cancer.
Kidding in everything you said.
what does that mean?
Asking for my interest?
I don't know how to ans.
I JUST FEEL THAT I AM SLOWLY LIKING YOU BACK.
I felt happy every time you replied my message.
I felt happy every time you make a jokes.
I felt happy every time you asked a question.
I felt happy every time you tell my your feelings.
I felt happy when you tell me jiayou.
YOUR JIAYOU IS THE MOST I WANT.
YOU TOO JIAYOU!
DONT PUSH YOURSELF TOO HARD TOO.
Life is like this.
THOUGH IT IS HARD SOMETIMES, BUT THESE TIMES WILL
DEFINITELY BE A TEMPORAY ONE.
Don't compare, just do your best. SO YOU WONT HAVE REGRET IN
LIFE WHEN YOU THINK BACK.
If cannot try again lorh.
NO HARM TRYING RIGHT.
SO LETS JIAYOU TGT.
Saturday, October 17, 2015 @ 8:09 AM | 0 notes
GOOD EVENING!
It's not in the morning but the opposite. NIGHTZZZ~~!
-ICHI-
I am dying cause I am super tired from intern and part time job!
Guess what? I am going to MALAYSIA tomorrow!
Hopefully, I am still alive after tomorrow!
I really cannot withstand people who complains tired.
It's not like I won't complain.
Just don't show me how tired you are when I am more tired!
I am struggling my own tasks too.
WORK, INTERN, SCHOOL. YOU THINK I AM NOT TIRED?
Yes, I only work one day there. BUT I AM NOT RESTING AT HOME
FOR THE OTHER SIX DAYS, PEOPLE!
We are of the same age so come on!
I know you are tired but if you are going to show others that you are tired.
Won't you think the rest will become more tired because of your atmosphere?
You are so young, I think you should have more energy than this.
HOUSEWORKS, YES. ALL OF US DO HOUSEWORK.
In addition, I am not energetic. I am dying too.
BUT IF I EVER SHOW MY TIRENESS, I GUESS I WILL BECOME MORE
TIRED AT WORK.
Life is like this and worst of all, you are in SINGAPORE.
The work life here is not what you imagine. Take it or leave it, up to you.
We are all here to work. SO DONT EVER SHOW ME THAT ATTITUDE EVER AGAIN.
We are not more relax than you either.
SO LIVE LIKE YOUR AGE.
-NI-
I guess I am really not born to be girl.
I AM NOT INTERESTED IN COSMETICS, HANDBAGS... ETC!
I thought I will slowly like to be pretty when I get older but
that does not seems to be the case.
I am so tom boyish....
Hence, I don't think I am able to find a boyfriend.
BUT WAIT!
Though I am tom boyish, I am straight. I LOVE MEN!
hahahahahahaa....
-SAN-
Sometimes, I really don't understand why am I working so hard on something that
wont happen at all...
I studied but my results remain to be poor.
I exercise but my weight didn't show any changes.
I tried hard to do my best at everything but everything seems to be nothing.
I REALLY CANNOT UNDERSTAND WHY I AM SO FAIL.
For whom I striving so hard for?
For what I am enduring for?
For when am I going to see success?
I really don't know.
I FELT LIKE GIVING UP TOO.
Its not that I can continue giving my best on something.
I wish to give up too.
I want to give up too.
BUT CAN I?
Do you know how hard is it to let go of something???
I am not that hardworking...
I am not that smart.
If I give up halfway, aren't I a loser?
That's why I endured.
-YON-
GUESS WHAT.
After like about a year of blank conversation,
I talked to him yesterday. 16/10/15
It had been a long time since I talked to him.
I guess you know who is that him le ba.
Oh gosh... like seriously.
But if without my work, I wouldn't have the dare to even message him.
I was like just missing him last few weeks
and had that urge to talk to him.
Luckily, I had or else I could not hold it back anymore.
THAT FEELING IS SO UNDESCRIBABLE.
I don't know what I am feeling too.
I was happy to had a conversation with him - someone I had or have a crush for so long.
not sure if I am still liking him...
If I am, why it does not feel like in secondary school anymore??
Do I still like him? Please tell me NO.
I used two to three years to put down.
OMG, PLEASE SAY NO!
I don't want like someone who wont like me anymore.
It is hard to control ... hide my feelings !!!
I WANT TO MOVE ON SIA!
Okayy.. it happened like this.
I was in a dilemma on what gift to give for males for Christmas.
This is a project handed over to me in my intern.
MY FIRST PROJECT so I don't wanna ruin it.
Thus, I think I can ask him since I think he is approachable anyway.
I decided to message him after lunch when the office is empty.
I didn't expect him to reply me that fast as he is working too.
I just asked him what should I get?
then he replied he don't know.
I answered: Its okay, Do you wear bracelets?
He said no.
I thought he will end the conversation but he continued.
OMG OMG OMG!
He asked where I intern at.
I replied insurance company without asking further questions.
Then he continued with the place he intern.
I DIDNT ASK THAT....
All I am interested is in the gifts. I AM SORRY boy!
He went on and tell me that there are many chiobus in his company.
DID I WANT TO KNOW???
Boy... That's not my question!
He was so cute that I wanna beat him!
If you are not interested in relationship , then don't tell me all these.
ARE YOU REFERRING ME NOT TO HABOUR ANY OTHER FEELING FOR YOU?
I WONT!!!!!
I AM ALSO NOT INTERESTED IN RELATIONSHIP NOW.
MY LIFE IS FULL OF SHIT WHICH I HAVE NOT CLEARED.
All I want now to graduate and go TAIWAN with my friends.
THEN FIND A DECENT JOB.
After that, see I wanna to continue on going to university.
BUT HAVE TO SEE RESULTS TOO.
I guess I wont be able to go with my current results.
Thus, I am not expecting more.
If can, I would like to study other areas like interior design.
I go work first la then consider what is the best for me.
THUS, I HAVE NO TIME TO THINK OF HAVING A BOYFRIEND TOO.
I think he think too much.
But he is being kind to continue to conversation.
As I will feel sad if he stop with a I don't know.
SO THANKS. HCM!
LOVE YOU AS A FRIEND!
I AM SO OVER YOU HAHA!
END WITH THIS HAPPY FEELINGS.
HOPE OUR FRIENDSHIP DOESNT DIES TOO!
